Bromantic Vacation

As I had some spare time I convinced a good friend of mine to book a trip to Fuerteventura, Spain with me. To be more specific we went to one of those German all inclusive clubs where you go to a foreign country just to remain on the property of the hotel and stay amongst Germans all the time. Well... at least we treated it like an all inclusive hotel although the drinks (after dinner) weren't included which resulted in a decent final bill for which we could have almost afforded another vacation.

I would (at least partly) blame the pretty awesome people we met there for that. There was this couple from Switzerland who both worked for a bank and of course all the prejudices about them being big spenders came up... but already during our first bottle of champagne they convinced us that they are pretty laid back. All kidding aside they were great fun which lead to several people mentioning that they will "hear us tonight"... basically telling us that we had the most fun at the dinner table and people noticed. Yes... I'm quite loud... I know. But from our interesting discussions about such fun topics as the Stockholm syndrome everybody could learn. (#thatshowyouflirt) Someone even got that exact question during a quiz the same week. I love to help...

The main thing we wanted to do during the vacation was sailing though. Which we did. We even brought two GoPros along to share some of the coolest catamaran footage ever... problem being that we couldn't do anything cool as there was way too little wind for that. The most noticeable thing we did was almost stranding on the beach in the middle of the zone for swimmers as they forced us to start backwards which is a pretty dumb idea with no wind. The instructor apologized for the order and we didn't hit nobody... so just pretty embarrassing.

Due to the lack of wind we also tried other activities like stand-up paddling. Everybody mentions that it is a great full body work out and I have to agree. You crunch your whole body when you fall into the water. You train your legs and arms when swimming back to the board and getting back on it is just like a muscle up. I had plenty of repetitions of that workout. Let's just say that the open Atlantic is not the best surrounding for doing stand-up paddling for the first time. Of course people were once again watching... but I think this was also not what we got most famous for.
So some people may have thought we are loud, don't know how to sail and aren't able to stand on a board... but most probably most of them thought my buddy and I are dating. Why? Well... we

• wore matching caps most of the day
• had the same shirt for sailing every time
• shared the room
• rubbed sunscreen on each others back in public (thanks bro!)
• and danced together to "how deep is your love"

We may have been misleading but as one girl mentioned that my buddy was the hottest guy in the hotel I guess the girls were pretty jealous of me...  I take that as a win! 

PS: Random question at the end. Did you order too many rum&cokes before if you order "just a Fanta" and you get a rum&Fanta??

Why I show up at a job interview with a black eye

I had to travel from Eindhoven to Italy for a job interview. That doesn't sound that difficult but for me it was quite a struggle. The time the interview got scheduled and the airport I needed to get to allowed only for one flight out of Amsterdam that leaves at 7:20 am. Of course there are no trains that would get me there from Eindhoven in time so I planned to travel to the airport the day before. I left work around 5:30 pm only to learn at the train station that all connections via den Bosch (a city) were cancelled as a train was stuck in the station. They didn't know when it would get solved so I tried to travel via Tilburg. Once I arrived there I've learned the problems were way bigger. Almost all trains where late. Anyways there was a connection via den Haag. That train got postponed... postponed some more... and even more. By the time it arrived the track from den Haag to the Amsterdam Airport was blocked because a lightning struck something. (My Dutch wasn't good enough to figure out the details.)

Now the train system claimed the route via den Bosch was open again. Only problem being that the train I got on didn't want to move... why? Lightning struck that track as well. Now they started to cancel trains... after some more waiting the den Haag connection was open again (according to their App). So I took the next train to den Haag just to realize they have closed the track to the airport again.

I was getting a little frustrated but not as frustrated as another guy who was throwing his luggage all over the place. When he saw that I had a phone on which I tried to figure out how to continue my journey he approached me asking for my phone. I have to admit that he didn't look very trustworthy to me, hence I said "no". He asked again. I repeated my answer. So he decided the best course of action was to just punch me in the face. That kinda proved my point of not trusting him but I guess he didn't see the irony in that.

While I was still trying to recover from the hit (dude was twice my size) he asked whether he could use my phone now. That made me grab my luggage and walk away... at slightly increased pace. Next thing he yells at me that I should call the police. Funny thing... the police was already on their way because they saw what happened. So I had to talk to them for a while.

After getting a giant frozen dumpling at the next supermarket (no ice available anywhere) I tried to continue the journey. Once again I found a connection but 10 minutes before the train was supposed to arrive the App told me the connection is not feasible anymore. So I decided to ask someone at the information counter. He claimed the connection was feasible... although when looking at his App it also told him the train won't go. Well... I trusted the expert. The train went from den Haag HS to den Haag central... and then back to den Haag HS. I realized that this won't help me so I got of that train.

Long story short: The next connection did work so I arrived at the airport around 23:30. That only allowed me 4h of sleep. I think I looked pretty bad during the interview... way to make a good first impression.

CrossFitter

One of the first things I did in the Netherlands was to look for a new CrossFit gym (or box as it has been pointed out to me). My hotel does have a gym which is quite nice and offers a bar for pull-ups and even a box for box jumps. But in both cases you bump your head against the ceiling which is just far too low. Keep in mind that the Dutch are way taller than I am so I don't know who designed this gym... but getting back to topic.
Now I'm a member of the "Powerhouse 040" in Eindhoven and the location is quite nice.

But I had to learn pretty fast that they do CrossFit a bit different over here. I was used to warming up on my own, having some time to work on the technique with a trainer an then having some energy left for the actual workout. My coach in the US mentioned several times that he has been tougher in prior years and that sit ups within a workout are a phase of "active recovery" but I didn't take that too seriously. I should have...
So here everybody does the warm up together. Fine by me. But the "warm up" includes things like 20 "man makers"... just to get started. If you don't know what that is you can watch the video below.



As if that wasn't bad enough the Dutch version of the man maker includes two push ups per repetition and all the 10kg dumbbells where taken so I had to go for 12.5kg (27,5 lbs). I'm quite sure someone is already thinking of it so let me spell it out... "if that is too much for me maybe I'm not the man I want to be". For further puns on me please use the comment function. :)
Another great example was the warm up for the 70.1 workout which includes only "75" burpees. They made us do 30 burpees for warm up... the exercise (I'm quoting) "everybody loves to hate". Everybody except Sven of course. (This time you can watch a women. ;))



After the warm up we get to the part for the technique in which you practice exactly the movements you will need for the workout. That does make sense but they have 1 trainer for up to 20 people so you don't learn much if you don't already know what to do.
Finally, after burning all the energy in the warm up and tiring the muscle groups you will need in a bit the real workout starts... and they are tough. They include fun things like 3 muscle ups. You can't do muscle ups? Well then do 6 chest to bars. Oh... you can't do chest to bars... then replace with 9 pull ups. That was one of the workouts where I hit the time cap. No matter how fast I was on the power cleans and wall balls... you will not see me do 45 pulls ups within 15 minutes. Luckily they have time caps for all work outs so the torture does come with a fixed end. :)

Carnival

Some of you might wonder how the first picture in this post is connected to Carnival so let me start by pointing out that Carnival in Germany isn’t only about dressing up and getting wasted. It’s also about politics.

So while the Brazilians present the Samba schools on the parade, the Americans their boobies the Germans present political statements. Let’s face it... the Brazilians also show their boobies but they dance while doing it so it’s art. Period. Anyways... I just wanted this photo to show on my facebook timeline.

My original plan for this year’s Carnival was to be in New Orleans and experience Mardi Gras. I already had my flight tickets and hotel room arranged before it turned out that I needed to return to Europe. Therefore my phone constantly reminded me at work on the Friday before Carnival that I should be on my way to New Orleans. Flight to Atlanta ready for checking in. Flight to Atlanta ready for boarding. Flight to New Orleans ready for boarding... and so on. Every message felt like a little stab in my heart.

But I learned pretty fast that the Dutch (at least in the south) also party pretty hard when it comes to Carnival. Let's do the Trump thing and compare photos to see who's better. Eindhoven on the top New Orleans on the bottom (I stole your photo Fabian). Clearly Eindhoven had the biggest party crowd ever seen on Carnival. Awesome people. I know them. Trust me. New Orleans... SAD! (I would love to write his speeches.)
But yes, I could have had that view on the parade in New Orleans as well...

I guess one of the biggest differences between Carnival in New Orleans and Europe that you can see on the picture is the temperature. Over here you have to dress so that you can survive 10 °C (50°F) for a while. Being half naked just isn’t an option in those temperatures.

But kidding aside the Dutch go all in on Carnival. While other countries mix the „being wasted part“ of Carnival with Samba, Boobies or politics the Dutch decided to mix it with some more drinking. For some of them around here that means 5 days of straight drinking. The city of Eindhoven has even an extra holiday for the Monday so people can keep on drinking on Sunday. How nice of them. My company stopped doing that 2 years ago. So my colleagues and I just started early by putting on some Carnival music at the office around 3p.m. and having a beer on Friday.
I did one day of Carnival in Eindhoven and felt like that was sufficient. Even back in Germany I'm not a carnival reveler and out here where you can't even sign along it doesn't get better. One of the guys I went out with even tried to get through it sober and believe me he didn't enjoy it. When he tried to order some water he got a shot glass with some clear spirit (Vodka I guess) because the bar keeper just couldn't imagine him to be serious.
When we arrived in the evening a lot of people were already on their way home because they were too drunk to keep going on. And then there were a lot of people who kept going on although they shouldn't have. So the first goal was to get to the same level as the locals. Luckily they had great offers like 10 beer for 15 Euro in one bar (well guess where we went) which helped a lot with that. Seemed to be such a great offer that they even checked the ID at the door which has never happened to me during Carnival. And guess what... while the two guys I went out with did have to show their ID I didn't. I will just claim that this was due to me not shaving which makes me look waaaay older. What I really liked is that the bars played some electronic music from time to time but somehow I still didn't connect to Carnival around here. Still I will always keep it in memory as I had to park my car outside the city center because of the parade. I couldn't get a ticket as the machine didn't accept my card but I thought it won't be too bad... guess what... 61,40 Euro (64 Dollar) for parking without a ticket. That's memorable.

The student hotel

In one of my blog posts I already hinted that my life is reverting back to a student status by having a student ID, not having a car and no plan for the future. Therefore it makes sense that I ended up living in a place called “student hotel”. I don’t know how to describe the place. They offer hotel rooms but also apartments for up to 12 months. I do think they also have classic dorm rooms with shared kitchens and so on. Anyways the place is pretty dope. It’s right next to the city center with supermarkets, restaurants and shopping possibilities and to the train station with fast food, stolen bikes and drugs. So everything I need right around me.

The place is brand new as it  just opened at the beginning of February. Therefore not everything is ready yet. For example the parking lot has no access control so I can park for free in the city center. The payment terminal for the washing machines and dryers is also not up yet so I can do my laundry for free as well. My room offers about 30square meters with a kitchen and a bathroom for myself on the 21th floor which provides a nice view over the city.

For all the coffee lovers out there: The kitchen comes with a Nespresso machine. I guess that shows the Dutch priorities because the rest of the kitchen equipment is rather an incentive to eat at a restaurant. To me it looks like they gave me the play school kitchen set for children 6+.

My company is paying 60€ rent for this equipment. I could have bought better stuff at IKEA for less. And why did I get 5 of the small sharp knifes? I guess one would't be enough to stab yourself to death. 

But let’s get back to being positive. The place really shows some love for details. You know how in many hotels you get a little chocolate on the pillow as a welcoming present. Here you get this:

Also the tissue box, the door signs and the telephone are great:

Though combining the yellow door sign with the welcome present and the tissue box right next to the bed makes me wonder whether this place is also a very special kind of hotel where people just spend a few hours rather than a whole night. I might need to put up the sign just to see what happens.

Dutch & Prejudices

So I arrived in the Netherlands and have spent some time here so I guess it is time to talk about whether I can confirm the prejudices I listed before or not.

Tulips: It’s winter and I live in the middle of a city so maybe not the best voraussetzungen to check for flowers… but based on my limited observations there are no tulips here. Though we all know they exist in huge quantities at the right time of the year.

Wooden shoes: Haven’t seen them yet. Though I guess this is like looking for Lederhosen when living in Berlin. Not going to happen.

Cheese: The supermarkets have an amazing selection of cheese which to me looks pretty much the same. Do you want your Gouda to be aged for 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 or maybe 6 years? It’s like having 30 types of milk. Anyways: Confirmed.

Deep fried food: Definitely. The cafeteria doesn’t really offer lunch but rather snacks. I’ve been there once and 4 of the 5 options for warm snacks (without the soup) were deep fried. And they have those really famous fast food shops which are basically full of vending machines… with fried food (see below). Even my Dutch colleagues admit that the Dutch kitchen isn’t worth mentioning. So let’s stop it right here.

Field hockey: Again wrong time of the year. Let’s wait for that.

Speed skating: Most of the female CrossFit trainers have been speed skating and have thighs like tree trunks. I think I can confirm that it is pretty popular around here. Netherlands winning all gold medals in this sport at the last Olympics may also be a tell...

Terrible soccer: An obvious one. Didn’t qualify for the last European championship. To use Donald’s a.k.a. the “best words”. They have some bad hombres in their team. SAD!

Terrible driving: I enjoyed driving in Germany so much that I directly got a ticket for speeding. The Netherlands are more like the US. Speed limit for all motorways… I guess it is so engrained in the Dutch DNA not to go above 130km/h (80mph) that they can’t drive faster even when being in Germany. Seriously: The closer you get to the Netherlands the slower the traffic gets as the percentage of yellow license plates increases.

Dutch people are tall: Hell yes they are. Half of my team is at least one head taller than me and the rest has my size. Still the plant here has stairs which are even to narrow for my little feet.

Bicycles: The Dutch claim to have more bicycles than people living here. That does sound impressive but from an efficiency perspective may also be a waste. Just saying… and why are there so many stolen bikes if they have so many excess bikes? Still I guess it is not a secret that it is the most bicycle centric nation in the world. Even my apartment comes with a free rental bike. During the rush hour the traffic is bad not because of the amount of cars but because of the amount of bicycles that have (or just take) right of way. Using the bike is definitely the quicker mode of transportation in the inner city. Interestingly enough also the scooters are allowed to use the bicycle lanes… maybe I should get one of those.

Is there anything I need to add after living here when it comes to prejudices? Yes! Coffee and sweets. I thought that the Swedish are the most crazy about coffee but oh was I wrong. Here they have a rule that the employees get deducted something like 7€ per month from their salary but in exchange get a coffee flat rate… and they are not afraid to use it. I guess on average every 30-45 minutes someone in the office stands up and asks “coffee?” which generally is answered by a nod. Then he gets coffee for the whole office. They use small plastic cups (0,2l) for that but still they add up. Today I counted 10 cups for one colleague. They even have a whole industry that produces different devices to carry as many cups as possible safely. So I’m back to being a social outcast again with not drinking any coffee… or soup… the machine also offers soup. I think that tells a lot about the quality of the coffee.

The other thing that is always present in the office are sweets. There is a whole table in the middle of the office dedicated to sweets. The amount they bring every day is amazing… the amount they eat as well. But at least that is something I can participate in.

Oh… one more thing that is present in the office all the time: Music. That by itself is not worth mentioning. But the kind of music. Every morning the radio plays classics. By that I mean Faithless, Captain Jack, RMB, Technoheads… I think it’s the first time in my life that I worked while listening to happy hardcore. Best work environment ever!

Beer for the world

There are plenty of untold stories from the US which I need to cover at some point before I forget them... so I better get started. This one is about the day I finally felt like I arrived in the states. It was June, 11th 2016. (Note to myself... getting poetic here.)
It was a warm summer day in beautiful Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. Nicolas, a German who recently moved to the US as his company wanted to screw his life a little bit, was meeting with some friends to celebrate their common heritage: Beer! Little did he know what lay ahead of him as in his youthful naive spirit he did not recognize the true meaning of the Lehigh Valley Hops Fest.

Ok... let's cut right to the chase. I went to THE beer fest in the Lehigh Valley with two German interns. The first thing that caught me by surprise is that it is organized by the Celtic Cultural Alliance of Bethlehem to preserve the Celtic culture. FYI: The town was founded by Germans so whaaaat?
Anyways... I paid 40$ to get a sampler glas and to be allowed to taste 110+ beers by 60 breweries in two hours around noon. Luckily we had about 32°C so drinking a lot in a short time was a bare necessity.
So I went to the first brewery. They had two beers. An IPA and an IPA. I tried the IPA and no surprise: Not my kind of beer. Just to hoppy. But you know what.. 108+ beers to go so no worries. Next brewery offered an IPA and another IPA. Ok. When in Rome do as the Romans do... still not to my liking. So I went for the map of the event to figure out where to go. Amongst all the IPA I saw a Berliner Weisse. Chemicals and beer? That sounds like something they could do well in the states so I went for it. What I got was a beer that looked like someone poured milk in it and tasted like someone squeezed a complete lemon in my glas. I have to admit I tried a cider after that just to reset the taste buds.
After some more IPAs the interns managed to find a brewery that offered Pilsener. So I got a refreshing Pilsener that tasted... hoppy. Panic spread in me and I was looking for a last resort... and there it was: Koelsch. This refreshing mixture of beer and sparkling water invented in Cologne and served in shot glasses is the one beer in the world which can't be hoppy. So there I was with manga stile eyes looking at the server saying "this is so great, you actually serve Koelsch here" and he responded "this is so great, you're actually German". I guess that means I rather sounded like "Zis is soooo gread, you eggually surf Koelsch here". But even after that bummer I was still excited... not for long. "You have to know this is an American style Koelsch" he said... "it has 8,6%" he said... it tasted hoppy I say.
I finally got why they called the whole thing hops fest rather than beer fest. *ba dum tsss

In the end we managed to find another brewery that offered Koelsch that tasted like Pilsener and we stuck with it till the time ran out. So it was 3pm, hot as hell and we were at a point where the interns thought it is was a better idea to get home and sleep till the next day. Luckily I met some more experienced people from the CrossFit who knew the German saying of "half drunk is wasted money" and wanted to continue drinking until the "clubs" in the Lehigh Valley opened. So this is what we did... we drank more IPA. I also learned another meaning of the word "gummy" (for all you Germans: This is not referring to condoms) and visited the Lehigh Valley food truck competition. Not to say that I was in a state to judge the quality of the food... but when I was sitting on a plastic chair in the middle of a huge parking lot next to an industrial ruin, the sun shining on me, totally wasted like everyone around me... I actually felt like I arrived.

We celebrated that by going to the "club", realizing it was empty, going back to the industrial ruin to watch the Copa America, to go back to the "club", which still was empty, to go to a bar (bookstore), to go back to the "club". Our decisions process may have been a bit unstable but it was fun. By "club" I'm referring to Molly's Irish pub by the way. And no kidding, after having a couple more beers I was standing at the bar looking at the premium beer selection. They had IPA, IPA, IPA and IPA... but in the upper left hand corner of the fridge I saw something I could not resist... an instant throwback to the times when drinking was easier... after the hoppiest day in my life I ordered a Smirnoff Ice.
They still make fun of me today...